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17 Ways to Touch a Vagina for Maximum Pleasure

Ever get a case of bedroom déjà vu? Once you discover a few no-fail tricks for touching and rubbing your partner's vagina and bringing them to orgasm, it’s hard not to fall into a sexual routine. “If something works, you want to keep doing it,” says Marianne Brandon, Ph.D., author of Monogamy: The Untold Story. “But at the same time, even the best moves can get old and worn out.” And although women often worry about taking too long to climax, they also don’t want to hit their peak in 60 seconds flat—which is what can happen if you go straight to your failsafe move every time. By contrast, if you switch things up, you may find that your partner's experience is more satisfying, since delaying their orgasm can make it stronger, says Brandon. Plus, “novel experiences elevate dopamine in the brain, and that promotes bonding,” adds Yvonne Fulbright, Ph.D., author of Touch Me Here. So save your signature skills for the grand finale and experiment with these 17 ways to touch your partner's vagina. 1) Open the clitoral hood. There’s a little flap of skin that covers the clitoris when your partner is not fully aroused—and it’s begging to be played with. “The clitoral hood is actually an extension of the inner lips,” says Fulbright. “It can be its own feel-good spot.” Early on in your encounter—before they've gotten so turned on that her hood retracts—give the hot spot on her vagina a little love: Trace their inner labia upwards until you find the fold just above their clitoris, and stroke it with your fingertips, making sure your digits are sufficiently slick with lube.When they're ready for direct clitoral contact, “you can use your thumb to push that skin up a little bit toward her belly button,” says Brandon. 2) Find the G-spot. First, let's get one thing straight: the G-spot isn't some mystical, hidden pleasure zone—it's just an internal portion of the clitoris. The clitoris is so much more than that little bud you see at the top of the labia; the wishbone-shaped organ actually extends up to five inches inside the body, and you can stimulate it with that classic "come-hither" motion you've probably heard about before. (If not: the trick is to insert a finger inside the vagina, palm up, and use a come-hither movement to provide stimulation.) Make sure she’s already wet before you work your way in, Fulbright says. 3) Cup the vagina. Your partner's outer labia may not be as sensitive as the rest of their parts—and that means it’s a prime place to start when you’re warming them up for an orgasm. When you’re making out, slip a hand down south and simply cup their vagina, pressing lightly. “This starts the blood flow and begins the process of arousal,” says Brandon. “It’s a gentle way to bring her into the experience.” 4) Play on their mound. First, an anatomy lesson: Atop the pubic bone, there’s a mound of fatty tissue where their pubic hair grows called the mons pubis. “When you play with the mons pubis, you can indirectly stimulate the clitoris,” says Fulbright. To wake up the region, use the heel of your hand to press downward on the mound, in the direction of their clitoris. 5) Give a massage. Before you part the outer lips of your partner's vagina, give the lips a little attention. “Take long vertical strokes along the vaginal opening, but don't go inside,” says Dr. Uchenna “UC” Ossai, Pelvic PT, certified sexuality counselor and founder of YouSeeLogic. “Massage down to the gluteal folds [the crease between your butt and thighs] and make your way back up towards the clitoris.” This is a great way to build sensual energy. That said, taking your time before touching their clit can do wonders for their arousal—so press their labia majora between your thumb and index finger, rubbing back and forth with a gentle massaging motion, then gently tug their lips upward. If your partner doesn’t shave, you can even lightly pull at their pubic hair, Fulbright suggests. 6) Circle their clitoris. As tempting as it is to race to your partner's clitoris, tease them a little before touching down. First, apply a little lube—hint: simply dip a digit into their vagina—to the padded part of your finger, and circle their clitoris, applying a firm, consistent pressure. “Experiment with both large and small circles around the clitoris,” Dr. UC says. “You can move slowly in the beginning, going both clockwise and counter-clockwise, and then gradually increase speed and intensity per feedback from your partner.” “The circling motion is one of the most popular with women during masturbation,” Fulbright adds.   7) Caress the cervix. If your partner prefers deep penetration, they probably enjoy the sensation of cervical contact—and a penis or dildo isn’t the only part of their body that can reach it. “When she’s excited, the cervix does pull back some,” says Brandon. “But the typical vagina is not that long.” So insert your finger until you can’t go any further, and gently massage their cervix, applying more pressure only if they responds with pleasure. “It can be really, really sensitive, so try it gently,” Brandon warns. 8) Re-angle their body. Stick with your standard way of stimulating your partner—the one that really gets them going—but switch up the position. “It will feel different because a woman’s body is so supremely sensitive that these little shifts can be pretty dramatic to her,” says Brandon. “She’s also going to have a different emotional reaction to what you’re doing.” In other words, if your partner is normally lying on their back when you get them off with an orgasm, trying the same technique on all fours can feel more animalistic. So get creative: Have them lean against a wall, bend over the kitchen counter, or stand up straight—then execute the move they love best. 9) Stimulate the vaginal opening. Unless you’re a high-school boy, you’ve learned by now that ordinary fingering—just gliding in and out—doesn’t do much for your partner. But that doesn’t mean hands-off altogether: “Use two or three fingers to work your way in and out, but make sure you’re not just going up and down—firmly rub against the lower vaginal canal,” says Fulbright. You can even linger in the opening of their vagina, moving your fingers in a circular motion, without ever taking them out completely. “Most of the nerve endings are in the lower third of her vagina,” says Brandon. “Women like to feel really full at the opening.” 10) Play the piano. Place your index finger on one side of their clitoris, your middle finger on the other side, and pretend you’re playing the piano, going back and forth, from side to side, suggests Fulbright. Rhythmic motions are typically the most pleasurable ones for people with a vulva—and stimulating the sensitive skin next to their clitoris is an easy way to build arousal and anticipation for an orgasm, she says. Eventually, you can move one finger so it’s on top of the clitoris itself for a more intense version of this move. 11) Use your hands during cowgirl. This trick gives whole new meaning to the cowgirl position: Have your partner sit on top of your inner arm, so their vulva is resting on your wrist and lower forearm. “Place your hand between her legs and cup her butt,” says Fulbright. Then have them grind against your arm, and once they've established a rhythm, move your arm to match the pace and intensity they prefer. “You’re able to touch a lot more surface area—it allows the whole area to come alive, instead of just one particular spot,” she says. Plus, the vaginal stimulation tends to be less direct—and therefore more tolerable for super-sensitive people. 12) Sweep the region. When you’re warming your partner up, graze your whole hand down the length of their vulva, using long, sweeping strokes. Keep it fleeting—don’t worry about hitting all her nooks and crannies along the way. “If you’re dipping inside, it's harder to make things rhythmic and smooth,” says Fulbright. “There’s one thing that women tell me gets them off: being rhythmic and consistent.” 13) Get both hands in on the action. Use the thumb and index finger of one hand to spread their labia, and use your other hand to stimulate their clitoris, suggests Fulbright. Not only will opening your partner up give you better access to the pleasure zones of their vagina, it will make them feel a little vulnerable—which can be highly arousing. 14) Keep their panties on. Yes, you’re eager to strip your partner down, but leaving their panties on can add a little pleasurable friction to your touch. (It’s also great if your partner is highly sensitive and prefers more indirect contact.) The ideal scenario: Your partner is wearing satin panties, not cotton, which will easily glide across their genitals as you stimulate them, says Fulbright.Once they're fully aroused, continue the action by pushing their panties aside, instead of removing them, Brandon suggests. “That has the high-school feel to it—‘I’m doing something wrong because my clothes are still on,’ ” she says. 15. Let your partner lead the way. Watching your partner masturbate is the ultimate way to learn what they like—but that level of vulnerability can be pretty intimidating for some people. So put their hand on top of yours, and try this line: “Show me what you like, baby.” “Do this in a sexy way—not an ‘I’m confused, help me out,’ kind of way,” says Brandon. Let them guide your hand—and be sure to make mental notes along the way to their orgasm. 16. Hit the clitoris from all sides. The classic side-to-side, up-and-down stimulation is undeniably awesome—and an almost surefire way to make them climax with an orgasm. But that’s really only hitting a portion of the clitoris. Brandon suggests lightly pinching it, then rubbing it in a circular motion between your fingers, as if you were wadding up a piece of gum. That way, you’re touching that hot spot from all angles, while also applying pressure. It’s the recipe for an amazing orgasm. 17. Bring in some sex toys. The use of an vibrator can be super helpful here, Dr. UC explains. You can use a vibrator at a high setting for extreme sensations or at a low setting to gently tease your partner. While your gut response may be to put the vibrator directly on your partner’s clitoris, “Remember the clitoris has long legs that come down on both sides of pelvic bones,” Dr. UC says. So you can apply the vibrator to other parts of your partner’s vulva, not just their clitoris. With your free hand, you can use another technique to stimulate your partner’s clitoris for maximum pleasure.

The Anal Masturbation Guide

  These days, we talk much more about anal sex with a partner, so much so that it’s becoming much less of a taboo subject (and quite rightly!). But what about anal masturbation? Our anal sex guides will always tell you that anal masturbation is the perfect way to explore your own body and find out what you like and your own limits, but it can be hard to know where to start as a solo anal beginner. Don’t worry though, we’ve got plenty of tips and advice to help you treat yourself to some anal exploration with a lot of fun and pleasure at the end of it. Anal Masturbation for Beginners Trying anal masturbation for the first time can feel like a tricky task, especially considering you can’t exactly see what you’re doing down there! The first thing to remember is that anal masturbation isn’t all about quickly finding five minutes and bringing yourself to orgasm – anal play is all about exploring another erogenous zone that can heighten the pleasure of your orgasms. If you’re a beginner, you’ll want to make sure you’re in the mood before getting started. Try a little clitoral play to get yourself going and help to relax you. There’s nothing wrong with reaching orgasm before starting anal play either – anal is all about getting yourself to the point of full relaxation, and any tension will make it difficult and painful. How to Prepare for Anal Masturbation Preparing for anal masturbation is the most important part, and it’s very much the same as preparing for anal sex. If you’re not fully prepared, you’re not going to have a great time. Get comfortable As we all know, it’s important to get in the mood for any type of sex. An anal douche is a good way to feel more hygienic prior to anal masturbation. Some people also find this sexually arousing so can be a good way to start your masturbation session. lube. Without lube, the whole experience can be painful and has the potential to cause you injury, so make sure you’re using plenty.  Relax Make sure you’ve got plenty of space and you’re comfortable. Many people find that having a bath is both cleansing and relaxing, so this can be the ideal place to try anal masturbation. Get any lube and anal toys close by so you’re ready to go. Lube Up The key for great anal, whether it’s masturbation or sex, is plenty of lube. Without lube, the whole experience can be uncomfortable and has the potential to cause you injury, so make sure you’re using plenty. Our guide on how to use lube should help if you need more guidance. Once you’re fully relaxed and have your lube and toys ready, you’re set to try anal masturbation. How to Anally Masturbate There’s more to anal masturbation than just picking a butt plug or penetrating with an anal dildo – much more. Taking anal masturbation step-by-step will make the whole process more pleasant, so just think about it as an exploration of somewhere new. Go slowly and try new things as you go along.   Start by making sure one of your fingers is well lubed. Use that finger to gently apply lube around the opening of your anus, making sure it’s liberally applied. This will help ensure penetration is as comfortable as possible.   There are thousands of nerve endings around the anus, so rubbing around this area will begin to stimulate those and should feel good.    Once you’re ready, you can slip a finger inside. Start with just one finger and very gently explore the area inside.   As you begin to relax, you can insert more fingers and increase the speed or angle of penetration.   If you do have any anal toys, now would be a good time to insert a well lubricated butt plug, anal beads, dildo or a vibrating anal dildo. Objects for Anal Masturbation Once you get into anal masturbation, you may get carried away and want to insert something a little bigger, however you need to be careful. We can’t stress this enough – only insert specially made anal sex toys! Nobody wants an impromptu trip to A&E with a household item stuck up there. Anal toys are made specifically to be inserted into the anus and are safe to use, plus they’re designed so you can’t get them lost. If you’re unsure of how to use a butt plug, or any other toys, just take your time. Anal Masturbation Positions We keep saying it, but anal masturbation and sex is all about comfort. If you’re not in a comfortable position, your body will naturally become much more tense, and penetration will be uncomfortable or even painful. There are some positions that can make anal masturbation much easier and more comfortable. The One Person Threeway This masturbation position is designed for all-over stimulation and comfort. Just lie on your back and lift your legs in the air – you can rest them on the arm of a sofa or the headboard of your bed for a more relaxed position. From here you’ll have one hand free to play clitorally or with your nipples, and with your legs in the air you can easily and comfortably reach down for anal play. The Long Way Round Switching it up for a position laid on your front means your legs will be a little more relaxed and, as we know, relaxation is important. Lay on your front on a comfortable surface and reach around the back for anal access. The Sleep Away Camp Find a comfortable place to sit with your back supported – this could be on your bed or on the floor. Spread your legs wide and you should find that the upright sitting position gives you the perfect angle for anal exploration. You can also play with your nipples or clitoris here for extra stimulation. Anal masturbation is the perfect way to discover more about your body, finding out what you do and don’t like, and helping you guide your partners when it comes so anal sex. For women, anal play can be a great addition to sex or masturbation, but it relies on taking time and not doing too much too soon. It can also be a fantastic way for men to explore P-spot stimulation and make those solo orgasms much more intense. Just remember, take your time, lube up and make sure you only use specially designed anal toys.
P & G spot massage


Erotic massage is an incredible way to get closer to your lover and hit the spots that really matter. This is not quite an A-Z but a G-P, getting straight to the good stuff and guiding you on how to up the ante with your massage techniques. Our top tips will provide you with all the info you need to get down and dirty, seriously heat things up and, guy or girl, hit the spot. Wave goodbye to taboos and be welcomed into the wonderful world of sexploration. MEN: P SPOT MASSAGE Are you ready to find out what you've been missing? Perhaps one of the last sexual taboos, prostate massage provides some serious stimulation and triggers longer and stronger orgasms. Massaging the prostate has the same effect as massaging the female G-spot. Found approximately one inch inside the anus, this ridged mound is packed full of nerve endings and ready to provide powerful, prolonged orgasms – no wonder Kanye is a fan of a finger up the bum. Guys, it's time to throw out your inhibitions and experience the power of the P spot.   PREP AND PLAY As with any anal exploration being clean is part of being confident; entirely optional, however, widely encouraged, douching is a simple and effective way to ensure that you're prep'd, primed and ready to go. Simply fill with lube warm water, lube up the tip and insert, squeeze the bulb to expel the water and excrete. This deep, internal clean leaves you fresh and ready to get filthy.   CHILL OUT, HOT UP Anal should never be painful – word from the wise. Take things slow and most importantly relax. The muscles of the sphincter can be tight, making that hot spot hard to find. If you're feeling tense take a steamy shower, take your time and take the plunge into the realms of serious satisfaction.   LUBE UP DUDE Lube, your new best friend. Enhance your pleasure, increase your comfort and add even more stimulation. Lubricant is essential for P-spot stimulation. With specifically designed massage oils and anal lubes you can tingle, warm, slip and slide your way to multiple Oh's. SLOW DOWN AND UP THE ANTE If you're playing as a pair, begin with a sensual massage focusing on the inner thighs. Get pulses racing and start to up the ante. There is no go-to formula for sexual gratification; however, there is a certain method to finding the sweet spot. Massage the prostate externally by rubbing and stroking the perineum. Hot things up, start with a lubed up finger, massage the rectum to relax the muscles and start stimulating the thousands of nerve endings sited there. Once you feel comfortable, insert the finger an inch or so, feeling for a ribbed mound. Once you have located the pleasure point gently stoke in a come-to-me motion increasing pressure and speed according to the reaction. Oh-Em-Pe! BACKSTAGE PASS This is your backstage pass to pleasure. Add toys to the mix and buzz your way to bliss. The prostate responds well to vibration and we stock a range of toys, specifically designed with curves and powerful vibration for serious P-Spot Stimulation. MEN’S TIP: Speak to your partner about slipping you a finger during intercourse, a prostate massage at the moment of climax makes for an insanely intense experience.  Up the ante and try anal beads; pull them out when you reach orgasm and find out just how good your P-spot can make you feel. Man up and give it a go. GIRLS: G SPOT MASSAGE G-spot massage can result in mind blowing orgasms and even female ejaculation. Many women struggle to orgasm from internal stimulation alone, however, with our top tips we guarantee that you’ll be screaming with satisfaction, like, Oh-Em-Gee   TURN UP THE HEAT The female G-spot is famously illusive so undertaking G-spot massage may feel like a daunting task, so just lie back and relax. When you're aroused the G-spot dilates and fills with fluid, making it easier to locate so get ready to turn up the heat. Start with a steamy, seductive massage focusing on all of your erogenous zones. Kiss, touch and caress until you feel deliciously desiring and red hot.   LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION Be patient. Start by spreading your legs making the vagina accessible. Palm up, insert a finger or two pressing forward and you should feel a ridged mound just a few inches in. You've hit the spot honey. Once you know where this sexual spot is located, it will be easier to direct your partner. Gently circle your G-spot, speed things up and apply more pressure depending on what you enjoy. Don't be afraid to be vocal – tell them what you like and exactly how much you like it.   BOOST IT, BABE Practice makes perfect and you can make it even more intense with simple exercises. Kegel exercises keep the pelvic floor toned but also allow you greater control over your orgasms. Pick up some weighted balls and wiggle your way to peak. DOUBLE TROUBLE Blended orgasms are next level naughtiness. Combine G-spot massage with external, clitoral stimulation. The nerve ending in these two areas are closely linked so climaxing from the two types of massage result in the most intense orgasms. Whilst your G-spot is being treated to a tantalising teasing, encourage your partner to use the other hand to gently rub your clitoris. This may be a little like rubbing your tummy and patting your head at first so lend a hand if necessary – it'll be oh-so worth it. Take it up a notch and get seriously saucy – have them flick their tongue or bullet vibrator over your clitoris whilst massaging internally. It's getting hot in here. An intense way to experience blended orgasms is with one of our famous  vibrators. The shaft massages the G-spot whilst the ears target serious vibrations straight to your clit. We haven't sold over 2 million for nothing. Use alone for unforgettable solo sessions or get your partner to use a rabbit or G-spot vibrator on you to take foreplay to a new, lip-biting level. Thanks to our expertly designed sex toys, finding your G spot has never been easier. 85% of our product testers experienced their most intense orgasm ever with our Moregasm collections, so however you want to play, ensure your bunny or your boy hits the G. WOMEN’S TIP: G-spot gel is an organic stimulant, developed with natural, active ingredients, it is specially designed to increase responsiveness and intensely stimulate the nerves around the G spot. Not to be confused with lube, a  pea sized amount to you or your partner’s fingertip, combined with a slow, come hither motion massage will be enough to make you ‘Oh, em, G!’.

The Beginner’s Anal Sex Guide

It’s naughty, taboo, and has long been referred to as the ‘holy grail’ of sex, but the veil of stigma surrounding anal is finally starting to lift. And to that we say, celebrate! “Anal sex shouldn’t be a topic that people avoid; we believe the key to any healthy relationship is communication and a desire to explore together.” Unfortunately, many people’s first experience of anal sex is accidental, or badly prepare, putting many people off for life. But, with good preparation, going in the back door can enjoyable for everyone involved. Whether you’re just curious, have a partner dying to try it, or need some advice on how to get fruity with the booty, then the Ann Summers beginner’s guide to anal sex is the best place to start.     Why have anal sex in the first place? For men, receiving anal sex is all about the P-Spot, a.k.a. the prostate. It’s the guy version of the female G-Spot, and is located a few centimetres up the anus. If you don’t know what we’re talking about, spend a little time getting to know the power of this area, and don’t be afraid to start exploring with your finger. Women don’t have a P-spot up there – sorry ladies – but anal can still be extremely pleasurable, as the booty is full of a ridiculous amount of nerve endings. “Did you know it’s possible for women to orgasm through anal sex? Remember, it’s all about pleasure, not pain” If you’re the ‘giver’ in anal sex, the tightness around the shaft is incredibly stimulating. The kinkiness of giving your lover a backstage pass is a thrill on its own; it’s a naughty, new way to play – huge turn on. But, as with all sex acts, if you don’t want to do it, don’t. Pressure isn’t sexy.     4 myths about anal sex Myth #1 It will hurt   This is the most commonly-heard myth about anal sex, but it doesn’t have to hurt. If it does, it’s probably been done incorrectly. It can be incredibly pleasurable for both partners; you just have to start slow and work your way up. Myth #2 It’s dirty If pain is the biggest myth, then this is a close second, and we understand the misconception. The truth is that it’s a passageway, not a storage area and so it doesn’t really contain anything “dirty”. But, that doesn’t mean that you should move from anal to vaginal sex or vice versa – this can cause vaginal infections – a huge no-no! Myth #3 It will damage your body Doing anything the wrong way can cause you physical damage, and the same goes for sex. If you experience vaginal dryness and need to use lube during sex but don’t, then you can cause micro-tears. It’s the same for anal sex, except your anus doesn’t produce its own natural lubrication, so it needs a little extra help. Myth #4 You’ll get stretched out You’ve probably heard that childbirth or too much sex can stretch the vagina beyond repair. This isn’t true. And it’s the same for anal sex. Regular and healthy anal sex (gentle and with plenty of lubrication) will not cause your anus to stretch. Just like the vagina, your back passage can accommodate a range of sizes; the key is to relax.       The must-follow dos and don’ts of anal sex THE DOS… DO use lube – And lots of it. If you think you’ve used enough, add a little more just for luck. More on this later! DO stop if you experience pain – Don’t force anything that doesn’t feel right. It’s normal to experience some discomfort especially if it’s your first time, but certainly don’t push through the pain. DO keep an eye on your partner’s body language – If you’re the giver, you need to keep a close eye on the receiver. Encourage them to communicate and stop if they look like they are in pain. DO wear a condom – Whilst it’s true that there’s no risk of the pitter patter of tiny feet, STDs are still transferrable. Anal sex should be fun and feel great; don’t let a nasty little infection spoil the party. THE DON'TS… DON’T dive straight in without warming up – We mentioned that you need lube, right? Real life isn’t like what you may have seen in porn; you can’t just thrust in and expect your partner to enjoy it. Foreplay is key. DON’T have a drink – If it’s your first time, you might be tempted to down a shot (or two) for a bit of courage. But we’d strongly advise against that, as you need to be fully aware of the sensations in your body at all times. DON’T go from anal to vaginal – Or vice versa. Yes, even if you’re wearing a condom. As clean as you may be back there, there’s still a whole lot of bacteria, so this is a big no-no. "Keep an eye on your partner’s body language. If you’re the giver, you need to keep a close eye on the receiver. Encourage them to communicate and stop if they look like they are in pain."     Start with anal foreplay Warm-ups aren’t just for beginners. Whether you’re a first timer or an anal addict, you should always warm up with some backdoor play. Get your partner to use a little lube and massage the entrance with their finger. This will help you relax and get used to the feeling of those nerves being stimulated. “Take things a little further with some anal toys.” For beginners, a small butt plug is perfect, and allows your muscles to get used to the feeling of having something inserted. For the more adventurous among us, anal beads are a new and exciting experience. Insert them gently and as pleasure heightens – to the point of orgasm if you’re stimulating the clitoris or penis – pull them out (slowly!) as they go over the edge for sensations worthy of screaming. Anilingus (a.k.a rimming or anal oral sex) is a great way to get more comfortable with the booty, too – very intimate and very erotic.     Preparing for anal sex Even if you’re raring to get started, don’t just jump in at the deep end. There are a couple of things you need to think about first, even if you’ve gone the back way a dozen times before… Hygiene We’ve already covered how this is everyone’s biggest worry when venturing on an anal expedition. So much so that it stops people from relaxing enough to enjoy it! This concern is totally normal, and honestly, the reality is that nothing horrifying will happen. Just prepare by heading to the bathroom that day, and cleaning thoroughly in a warm and soapy bath or shower before you get busy. If you’re still concerned, put your mind at rest and use an anal douche. It’s a squeezy bulb with a small tube that’s used to clear your passage. Don’t be intimidated! Fill it with lukewarm water, lube up the tube, insert slowly and gently squeeze. Rinse and repeat until the water runs clear. You’re good to go. Lubes If there’s one golden rule for anal sex, it’s grab a tube of lube. Don’t misunderstand us; we don’t just mean a little squeeze. We really do mean a lot, particularly if you’re a beginner. Unlike the vagina, the A-hole does not produce any natural lubricant, so it’s an essential tool in your sex toy chest. It’s not just for safety; it’ll feel better too! Lube heightens sensitivity and can also help your muscles to relax. It also provides a cushioning effect to reduce the risk of tissue tears. There are lubes out there that have been specially designed for anal sex, and there are a few golden lube rules to follow. Opt for thicker lubes, as they won’t dry out as quickly as the thinner variety, so you don’t have to worry about reapplying. Be sure to steer clear of the numbing or tingling varieties too. Although you may jump at the chance for numbing to reduce your discomfort, it also means that you may not notice when something damaging is happening. So, we’ll say it again for the people in the back: lube up, hotties. Condoms We said earlier that it’s important to use a condom during anal sex, but you should still wrap up even if you’re with a long-term partner. Whilst you may both be 100% sure that you’re clean from STIs, condoms are still an effective way to make sure anal play is hygienic. Just check that the type of lube you’re using is condom-safe – always use water-based or silicone-based with latex condoms. Avoid oil-based as these can cause the condom to break. "The truth is that you can perform anal sex in almost any position that you want; what’s important is that you’re comfortable."     The best positions for anal sex Thought there was only one way to play? Think again. The truth is that you can perform anal sex in almost any position that you want; what’s important is that you’re comfortable. Many people, particularly first-timers, will feel nervous at the thought of going on top, but the truth is that it gives you much more control. Anyway, enough foreplay, here are a few of Ann Summers’ favourites…   Missionary This one is ideal for anal sex beginners, as it allows the receiver to get comfortable, lay back, and relax. It’s intimate, easy, and perfect for communicating during a first time. It makes anal sex less ‘porno’, and more an act of love and trust. Top tip – prop some pillows under your hips and legs if you need a better angle.   Spooning Everyone loves a good spoon, don’t they? This is gentlest and most easy-going position, which makes it perfect for beginners. Both of you lie on your sides, with the giver behind the receiver. It’s very intimate – cosy, even – and control over the situation is split pretty equally.   Doggy Style The classic anal sex position, and the one that most likely springs to mind when a conversation turns to the backdoor. The receiver is on all fours, the giver kneeling behind. Simple enough. But it’s important to be careful with this position, as there’s quite a lot of leverage involved thanks to the ample support provided. It’s easy to start going too hard or fast, and the control is entirely in the hands of the giver, so communication is key.     Getting started with anal sex As with everything, make sure you can walk before you run. Everyone’s first foray into anal will be different – some may relax with ease whereas others will find it difficult – but don’t worry, we’ve got your back. Go slow and steady Anal sex shouldn’t hurt if you’ve lubed up enough, turned up the heat with some foreplay, and started out nice and gentle. A little bit of discomfort on your first try isn’t necessarily anything to be afraid of – but if it’s too much, you should probably stop. The tip of the penis is usually the widest part (the same is true for a lot of dildos, too) so take your time. Once it’s in, you’ll be able to relax and give yourself over to the pleasure. Try and relax your muscles This can be easier said than done, but we promise it’ll make the whole experience more pleasurable. Try to relax and constrict your bum muscles as much as possible – kind of like an anal edition of a Kegel workout. If you’re really struggling to relax on a physical level, it may be a sign that anal sex isn’t for you. Don’t mix it up too much By all means swap between different anal positions, but you need to be careful if you’re combining anal with any other sexual activity. Your hand, mouth, penis, and toys can easily transfer bacteria – so if any of these have been *up there*, they’ll need to be cleaned thoroughly before they go anywhere else, like the vagina. Don’t double dip. Keep essentials handy Did we mention that you need lube for anal sex? Third time’s a charm! Even if you’ve applied plenty beforehand, it’s always wise to keep the tube nearby for quick re-application. It’s also a good idea to keep some wipes handy just in case. Even if you’ve cleaned and prepared properly beforehand, there isn’t likely to be any evidence, but it’s good for extra peace of mind. Remember to keep your toys clean, too! "When it’s done right, anal sex should be fun and pleasurable for both involved"     Anal sex aftercare The deed is done, and we’ve hope you had an incredible time. When it’s done right, anal sex should be fun and pleasurable for both involved. Now it’s time for the aftercare; a step that should not be skipped in any healthy relationship. Take a trip to the bathroom – Once you’ve finished, the receiver will probably feel the need to head to the bathroom. It doesn’t matter whether you ‘go’ or not, but it’s important to have a quick wipe down anyway. Talk about it – If it’s your first time trying anal sex, you should talk about it with your partner. It’s important that you both, not just the receiver, let each other know how it was. Were you into it? Was it uncomfortable? Is it a definite no-go, or do you think another position might work better? Of course, don’t be afraid to say that it wasn’t for you. You shouldn’t be pressured into doing something you don’t like. Any partner who cares will understand that. Any lasting discomfort? – It’s perfectly normal to feel a little ‘strange’ back there, especially it’s your first venture into the unknown, and this should clear up soon. But, no matter how un-sexy it is, if you’re left with any lasting discomfort, pain or bleeding after anal sex, you should pop in to see your GP or a professional at a sexual health clinic. We know it may be embarrassing, but you really can’t ignore this sort of thing. Your health is far more important than a few seconds of being red faced, and we guarantee that they’ve heard it all before.
What is rimming

What is Rimming?

  Rimming, otherwise known as analingus or a rim job, has seen a sharp rise in popularity in recent years. Once seen as an unhygienic and somewhat taboo sexual practice, more and more open-minded and experimenting couples are trying their hand (or tongue) at rimming. But what is rimming and is it even pleasant, or safe, for that matter? Well, if you’re getting curious about rimming and want to know more, we’ve got you covered. Here’s everything you need to know about performing a rim job. What is a Rim Job? Put simply, rimming is sexually stimulating your partner's anus using your tongue. This can mean licking, kissing or penetrating it. Just like any sort of anal play, there’s plenty of pleasure to be had, whether male or female. The anal walls and anus itself are full of nerve endings, meaning that rimming can feel fantastic and add a naughty new element to sexual activity. Just like trying anything new in the bedroom, rimming for the first time can be daunting, whether giving or receiving. All sex requires good communication between both partners and honesty when it comes to limits, and this is just as important when it comes to rimming. Make sure that you and your partner have discussed the idea before trying it, nobody wants to be caught off guard by an over-zealous partner! Don’t rush in! Remember that, although rimming may be part of foreplay, there’s no need to just go for it. Just like penetrative sex, work towards rimming and don’t dive in. This gives both of you time to feel relaxed. Is Rimming Unhygienic? The simple answer? Not if you don’t let it be! As with any anal play, cleanliness must play a very big part. When it comes to rimming, due to the direct contact between the tongue and anus, it’s important to ensure that you’re nice and clean. There are obviously extra risks associated with rimming, as faecal matter and E.Coli are found in the anal area. Ingesting these things can obviously make you ill, but don’t let that put you off, ensuring you’re clean and exercising a little caution around this should avoid any illness. You might hear people saying that you need to go extra cautious with your preparations, including anal douches and more. Whilst everyone is free to do that, it’s not necessary. Having a thorough wash beforehand will suffice. To help everyone relax a little, you could even combine a shower or bath with foreplay. Getting soapy and steamy together will act as foreplay, whilst giving you both the peace of mind that you’re nice and clean. How to Give a Rim Job Giving a rim job is just like any type of oral sex… Well, obviously, it’s a little different. The same basic rules apply though. Here are a few tips to help you up your game, learn how to rim and make yourself rimming royalty.   Start Off Slow They say only fools rush in, and this applies to every part of sex. Take your time to build up to rimming, ensuring you’re both fully prepared and relaxed.   Get on their Nerves Make the most of those nerve endings around the anus. Just as you would when performing cunnilingus, use your tongue to tease around those sensitive areas and gradually increase the pleasure.   Mix It Up The tongue is a powerful muscle and can be moved into numerous different positions. Make the most of this when giving a rim job. Make it flat, pointed, flick it, push it, and just generally mix it up!   Listen to Your Partner Another one that should always apply but can be particularly important here. Listen out for the noises they make, that’ll help you figure out what they do and don’t like. Follow their lead and you’ll be onto a winner.   Lube Up Lube isn’t just for penetration. Try using some flavoured lubes to make things a little more interesting for the giver. These are just some basic ideas to help you give a great rim job, just remember that everyone has their own preferences, likes and dislikes. Be open to figuring these out and adapting to what your partner wants. Rimming Positions So, you’ve had the discussion and decided to give rimming a try, but what position can you get in to make the most of it? Well, we’ve got a few options to spice up your analingus… and any other oral activity, for that matter. Four on the Floor Four on the Floor is the perfect position for rimming. With both you and your partner on all fours, you’ll have all the access you need to give or receive some next-level anal pleasure. It also provides you with perfect access to plenty of other erogenous zones. Riding High The Riding High position truly places you in control of oral sex. This position is all about straddling your partner over their face whilst they’re laid back. Although originally designed for cunnilingus, just shuffle yourself up a little higher and its perfect for rimming. The Full Frontal Another position that was originally designed for cunnilingus but can work just as well for rimming. Whereas in the original version you effectively be sat on your partner’s face, just scoot up slightly and let them get rimming. Don’t get us wrong, rimming isn’t for everyone, but it can add an exciting (and very pleasurable) element to foreplay. Just like the perfect blowjob or spot-on cunnilingus can set the tone for an amazing session, rimming can do the same. If you think it could be something you enjoy, forget the old-fashioned attitude that rimming is ‘dirty’ and try something different.

How to Prepare for Anal

So, you’ve read our Anal Sex Guide and made the decision to try anal for the first time, but where do you start? It can feel a little daunting when trying something so new and different in the bedroom – after all, everyone is always keen to share their anal horror stories. Well, we’re here to tell you that there’s nothing to worry about! With the right preparation and care, anal can be one of the most exciting, fun and, most importantly, pleasurable things you’ll do in the bedroom. Our How to Prepare for Anal guide will tell you everything you need to know before embarking on your first ever anal adventure. Just read on, get ready and have the time of your life! What is Anal and is Anal Sex Safe? OK, OK, asking ‘what is anal?’ might seem like a pretty obvious question but stick with us on this. Anal sex is about much more than just penetration and preparing for any sort of anal play is equally important. Anal is a term that encompasses a whole manner of play around the anal area. This ranges from foreplay like rimming through to using toys such as a butt plug or anal beads and penetration as part of intercourse, either with a penis or a strap on dildo, sometimes known as pegging. So, is it safe? Well, anal sex is perfectly safe, if you’re properly prepared. It shouldn’t be painful and certainly should not cause you any damage or injury. Anal sex can be a slightly scary prospect for some people, so remain relaxed and take your time to get yourself fully prepared to help ensure nothing goes wrong. As the old saying goes “fools rush in” – this is never truer than it is with anal! Does Anal Hurt? We’re not going to lie to you here, anal can sometimes be a little uncomfortable at first, and we’d always recommend that you stop what you’re doing if it begins to hurt too much. However, with the proper preparation and a patient build-up, you can help avoid discomfort and instead enjoy all the wonders that anal has to offer. If you’re losing your anal virginity, just like losing your vaginal virginity, there’s always a chance of a little discomfort at first. With more practice over time, this should start to improve. Remember, if it hurts too much or continues to feel uncomfortable, just stop! How to Prepare for Anal Sex Once you've settled on the idea of trying anal and the time comes to get down to business there are several things to remember to help ensure a good time. Remember to always keep things at your own pace, so if you’re with a partner, tell them if you need to slow down or want to abandon the idea. Just follow our step-by-step guide and you should find yourself having a great time in no time!   Lube Lube Lube! There’s no better place to start when it comes to anal, lube really is your best friend in this situation! Unlike vaginal penetration, there are no natural bodily fluids released during anal, meaning that you’ll need a good lubricant to help with any penetration, whether it’s a finger or something a little bigger. The more lube the better!   Go Solo First Just as masturbation can help you learn your body and figure out what you like, the same applies to anal. Have an experiment on your own, when the pressure is off, and you have time to discover your limits. Once you get to doing it with a partner, you should feel a little more prepared for what to expect and be able to guide them to what you like.   Take Your Time We said it before, and we’ll say it again – don’t go rushing in! There’s nothing worse than an over-zealous partner catching you by surprise. Make sure you take your time and build up to any anal penetration. Nobody’s going to have fun if you take things too quickly.   Keep Communicating Before, after, during – communication is absolutely key as part of preparation for anal. Discuss your limits, what you do and don’t want and continue to do this throughout. If something’s uncomfortable make sure your partner knows, or if you’re playing solo, try something a little different if it’s not working for you.   Relax Relaxing can mean many different things to different people. Some prefer to prioritise making sure they’re clean beforehand. Our rimming guide has some great tips on cleanliness which can help remove any paranoia about people playing in that area. The tenser you are during anal, the more likely it is that you’ll feel some discomfort as those muscles around the sphincter stay tensed up. Some deep breathing can help to release these.   Introduce Toys Sex toys are the perfect thing to help ease you into anal play. Instead of jumping straight from finger to penis or strap-on, they offer a nice middle ground and are all designed to feel great. Butt plugs come in a range of sizes, so you can easily graduate up through them at your leisure. Anal beads and anal dildos also offer great options for those who want to use a toy to prepare. There is somewhat of a mystique built around anal sex at times, and it can make the idea of trying anal play feel intimidating. There’s really nothing to worry about though; as long as you’ve discussed the idea properly and feel certain it’s something you want to do, it’s all down to good preparation. Just follow the steps and remember to have fun! Remember, failing to prepare means preparing to fail!

How to Have a Threesome

  So, you’re thinking about a threesome? Great news – threesomes can be super rewarding and a great way to explore with your partner. However, if you and your partner are thinking about introducing an additional person, there are a number of things you should consider first. From planning a threesome to what to do when the three of you are between the sheets, our guide tells you everything you need to know to have a thrilling three-way. What is a Threesome? While the dictionary definition is ‘a group of three persons or things’, we imagine you’re here for the slightly sexier version of a threesome. Simply put, a threesome is three people having sex with each other. Often, this can be a couple introducing a third person into the bedroom, although threesomes between single people definitely can and do occur. There are no set rules – threesomes can be any combination of genders, and any number of sex acts, from oral and stroking through to vaginal or anal sex. How to Prepare for a Threesome Despite the sexy experience and physical reward, adding a third player can be an emotional minefield. If you’re considering arranging a threesome for you and a partner, make sure you think about the below considerations to ensure you have a safe and satisfying menage a trois. How to Tell Your Partner You Want a Threesome First things first; how do you pop the question?! Answer – very gently! It can be difficult to predict how someone will react to the suggestion of bringing a third party into the bedroom, so try to gauge your partner's feelings about threesomes before rushing in and trying to make plans. As with anything sex related, an open discussion is a must. Bring up the topic of threesomes when you’re both comfortable and can talk freely. Ask your partner if they’ve ever had a threesome in the past or if they would ever consider one in the future, rather than diving in straight away asking them to have one with you. Start slowly and carefully and then, based on their levels of enthusiasm, you can gradually express your interest in organising a threesome together. Will a Threesome Impact Your Current Relationship? You should never have a threesome unless you’re both sure that it’s something that you want to do. If your partner isn’t sold, talking or pressuring them into introducing someone new is a recipe for disaster, so make sure it’s something that you both want in equal measure. Jealousy is something you really need to take into consideration before introducing a third player to the bedroom. Not everyone is comfortable with sharing their partner, so take all possibilities into account. You may both be comfortable with the situation in principle, but what would you do if you or your partner became uncomfortable during the session? Cover off all the possibilities to ensure it all doesn’t go pear-shaped when you get down to it. How Will You Agree On The Third Player? Finding a third member that you’re both attracted to and who is attracted to you both may be harder than anticipated. Agree together on who your new partner should be, talk about every detail – what will their gender be, and their sexuality? One of the most common queries around threesomes is ‘how to find people for a threesome’. So where will you find the new lover? If you’re going online, make sure you do this activity together. Take extra precautions when meeting people online – make sure they’re who they say they are, set very clear boundaries and meet in a public place first to make sure you’re all happy with the arrangement. If you’re going to be sleeping with someone you already know, think hard about how you’ll feel when you see them again. Discuss whether this is a one-off or if there is scope for it to happen again. Laying all this out before you begin your journey makes for less tension and bumps along the way. Set Expectations and Boundaries Threesomes work differently for every couple – some will want their partner to focus their attention on their existing relationships, others get off on watching their significant other sleeping with someone else. Be VERY clear on what you consider to be okay and what isn’t. Create a tick list and go through it together – would you want your partner to kiss the third player? Would you want your partner to have full intercourse with the third player? Talk about positions and scenarios and be sure to communicate these with your new partner before the threesome takes place. You should also set up a safe word, so anyone involved can opt-out if they feel uncomfortable. And most importantly, if either you or your partner want to stop at any point, everyone should stop. By establishing some really firm and clear boundaries you’re more likely to have a safe and enjoyable threesome. Be Prepared With Protection Although you may not use protection with a long-term partner, it is important to think about it before introducing someone new. Have a frank discussion about sexual health with any new partners to make sure you’re all being safe. If you’re using condoms and planning penetration with multiple partners, be sure to change or remove the condom before switching partner. If you’re playing with toys together, these all need to be wrapped too in order to keep everyone safe. Think carefully about every eventuality and be sure to have everything you need to have safe sex. Decide Where Your Threesome Will Take Place You know who, you know how, but you need to establish where. If you’re not comfortable bringing someone new to your home or your bed, you may want to opt for a hotel room to separate the act from your everyday sex life and scene. Decide before you do the deed and make sure your plans are clearly communicated to everyone involved. How Does a Threesome Work? So, you’re all prepared and getting down to the big event. Now what? Threesomes work differently for different people, so there are no set rules on how they should work for you. Play around with stroking, oral and penetration, and just go with whatever feels good at the time. Pay attention to body language and use subtle motions to direct your partners however you like. While manoeuvring three people can feel tricky and a little awkward at first, if you just have fun with it and laugh through any initial clumsiness, you’ll soon embrace the moment and all the pleasure it can bring. The most important thing is to keep everyone involved – if it starts to feel like one person is being left out, just reach over and play with them to bring them back into the action. It’s often recommended that the final orgasm of the session happens between the original couple. Climaxing together, without the involvement of the third party helps you to feel that the experience was more about the two of you. This also helps you to soothe any feelings of jealousy which may be bubbling by reassuring your partner that you’re truly turned on by them and them alone. What to Do After a Threesome The time after a threesome is of the utmost importance. Most importantly, establish with your partner and the third person how you expect things to go once you’re finished. Is a sleepover on the cards, or would you rather the third person left immediately? Make this clear before you start, so you don’t have any awkward conversions afterwards. Make sure you take time to speak with your partner and be affectionate. Re-assure your partner of how special they are to you while discussing what went on. Have an open discussion about things you both enjoyed, or didn’t enjoy, and voice any feelings you have. If you’re feeling any jealousy or anxiety, speak about this rather than dwelling on it. As with any sexual activity, the most important thing is communication. Being clear with each other about what you like and how you feel is the best way to turn each other on and enjoy your time between the sheets. Threesomes can be ultra rewarding and a great thing to tick off your sexual bucket list. Just keep it safe, sexy, consensual and well-considered, and everyone involved can enjoy the experience of their dreams.

How to Give a Great Hand Job

  Are you ready to hone your hand job skills? This move may have been in your repertoire for some time, but even so, there’s always time to learn some new moves. This is your handy guide to hand jobs, your manual handling 101 and your reason to get a (new) grip. How to Give a Good Hand Job: 11 Top Tips   Lube It If you love it, lube it. Keeping it wet and wild with a lubricant or oil is the sure fire way to make your hand job memorable. A well lubricated hand job allows you to apply more pressure, glide over the head, shaft and balls with ease and stimulate even more nerve endings. With lube we always say more is more, and that’s never more true than with hand jobs!   Use It You’ve lubed it, so use it. Every inch of the penis is an opportunity for pleasure, although the head is a hot spot of nerves and a guaranteed way to get him off. The frenulum and scrotum are both areas that need some extra attention. With your hand wrapped around his shaft, stroke the frenulum (the string of skin which joins the head to the shaft) with the pad of your thumb while working in up and down motions. The balls are often neglected, but gentle cupping, stroking and sucking will have him moaning in no time. If he’s up for it, playing with the perineum (the area of skin between the balls and anus) will also drive him wild. Just apply steady pressure and massage the area with a finger as you stroke his shaft to take your partner over the edge.   Less Pump Continually pumping up and down isn’t necessarily the recipe for an award winning hand job. To perform the best hand jobs, you should twist, twizzle and massage. Shake things up and beat the arm ache. Hand jobs shouldn’t be a straight up and down shuffle – mixing up your movements whilst keeping a rhythm will keep things interesting and treat him to a variety of amazing different sensations.   More Pressure When it comes to giving hand jobs, a good grip around his penis is definitely appreciated. Shake things up by varying your grip, going from soft to hard as you travel up the shaft then giving a mind-blowing squeeze when you reach the super sensitive head.   Do The Twist This technique will give him an orgasm to remember. To master it, you need to stroke up and down in a twisting motion. Start with your hand wrapped around his shaft at the base, with your thumb pointing down. Imagine a ‘thumbs down’ motion, and you’ve got it! Then, stroke up and over the top of the penis, applying extra pressure with your hand as you reach the sensitive head. As you reach the head, rotate your hand so your thumb is facing upwards as you stroke down again. Repeat this motion, switching hands as you go. He’ll thank you – we promise!   Take Your Time and Enjoy It Hand jobs sometimes get a bad rep, mostly because they’re viewed simply as something to help you along to sex. However, done right, a hand job can lead to a truly mind-blowing orgasm for him. Rather than rushing through it, treat a hand job as the main event – after all, if you’re taking your time and enjoying it, he’s more likely to enjoy it too. And, once you’ve given him the time of his life, he can then return the favour. Win-win!   Pick a Position Hand jobs offer a wealth of options when it comes to positions. Keeping things fresh sometimes involves looking at things from a new perspective… literally. Offer a cheeky reach around next time they’re waiting for the kettle to boil, practice your ‘rusty trombone’ (rimming whilst giving a hand job) or simply adjust the angle of his penis to bend down, ever so slightly, while you practice your new technique. Get him to tell you what he likes as you do it – the power is in your hands.   Play With Toys Vibrators aren’t just for us ladies. Introducing a toy into the mix can take things to new heights during a hand job. Try teasing him with a bullet vibrator across his balls or up his shaft – the vibrations alongside your stroking will seriously blow his mind! To bring an extra kinky element into your play, introduce a realistic textured stroker. Or, to keep him harder for longer and really make the most out of your new hand job techniques, slip on a cock ring. Good vibes all round!   Get Your Mouth Involved An instant way to up the ante when giving a hand job is to involve your mouth, so try licking and sucking the head of his penis as you stroke. The extra lubrication and range of different sensations will send him over the edge in no time.   Get Vocal As with all sex, communication is key to you both having a fantastic time. Keep an eye on your partner to gauge what they like from their reactions. Better yet, introduce some kinky talk; ask them if they like what you’re doing, if they want more, or ask what they want you to do. Playing around with a little dirty talk will help set the scene, ensure both of you are turned on, and make everything you’re doing feel so much better.   Preparation is a Must Ultimately, the goal of a hand job is to make your partner ejaculate (unless this is strictly foreplay, in which case, keep control of your speed). Be ready to deal with what is going to ensue and decide exactly where you want this to end up. Whether it’s your mouth, boobs or on his belly, bear in mind where he’s going to finish to avoid any last minute panic when he’s ready to blow. If you’re unsure where he wants to finish, just ask him, or suggest a place yourself – vocalising it will just turn the two of you on even more. The best hand jobs are when you’re both relaxed and enjoying yourself, so just communicate, find out what he likes, be enthusiastic and have fun. Along with these top hand job tips, just seeing how much you’re loving getting him off will truly drive him wild.

Discreet Sex Toys

  People often find themselves getting a little embarrassed over their sex toys. Whilst we don’t think there’s anything to be embarrassed about when it comes to owning and using a sex toy, we understand why some people like to keep it to themselves. If you’re living in shared accommodation, maybe you don’t want your housemates tuning into a low buzzing noise, or if you’re heading on holiday you may have had the nightmare of that vibrator going off in your hand luggage. Well, if you like to keep your sex toys on the subtle side, we’re here to help. There are a whole host of options available to keep that pleasure coming… without the rest of the building knowing about it! Why Use Quiet Sex Toys? Quiet sex toys are perfect for those who want to enjoy the benefits of a sex toy, whether solo or with a partner, but are a little self-conscious about housemates, parents or anyone else hearing them. Some vibrating toys can get a little loud, so if you’re not prepared to blame it on the electric toothbrush, you might want to find something a little more subtle – that’s where quiet sex toys come in. We’ve said this many times before, but sex, masturbation and achieving satisfaction require you to feel relaxed and at ease to get the most from it. This means if you find yourself tensing up and getting distracted because you’re paranoid about the noise, a quiet sex toy could be the perfect choice for you. What Silent Sex Toys Can I Find? Even though you’re fairly certain nobody can hear the buzz of your vibrator, if there’s that seed of doubt in there it can really make you lose your focus. There’s no use struggling to reach orgasm because the toy you’re using has you worried about the noises coming from your room. Luckily, there are a wide variety of toys available that can help you have all the fun with none of the noise complaints! Dildo As it has no mechanical features at all, the classic dildo makes for the perfect silent sex toy. Designed to hit all those internal spots that a penis can hit, its completely silent operation will rid you of that noise paranoia and let you focus on pure pleasure. Butt Plug Although you can find vibrating butt plugs, many of the anal toys we stock are available as completely silent toys. If you want to replicate the extra sensations you can get from a vibrating toy but without the noise, a butt plug is a great place to start, helping stimulate the nerve endings in and around the anus. Jiggle Balls As well as being ideal for Kegel exercises, jiggle balls can help target your G-spot and stimulate you internally. This makes them perfect if you’re too shy for a vibrator and are manually stimulating your clitoris, providing you with double the pleasure and no noise. Anal Beads Another ideal silent sex toy is the anal bead. These amazing beads are a great beginner’s anal toy, allowing you to slowly push them in as you play. Gently remove them as you orgasm, and you’ll find yourself in a whole new world of pleasure. Small and Discreet Sex Toys Noise isn’t the only factor you may be considering when looking for a discreet sex toy – size also matters when it comes to discretion. Whether you’re looking for something to securely and subtly pack away when travelling or need something nice and small to pop at the back of your sock drawer away from prying eyes – a small sex toy can be ideal. If you’re looking for small and discreet, there can be few better places to start than a bullet vibrator. These little but powerful sex toys can pack a lot of pleasure but are small enough to keep safely out of eyeshot of anyone you don’t want to catch a glimpse of them. If you’re a couple looking for a discreet sex toy, a cock ring could be the perfect purchase. Small enough to pack away nicely in a suitcase or keep in your bedside cabinet, a cock ring can also add intense vibrations to sex and help your partner stay harder for longer. We don’t think that sex toys should be anything to be ashamed of, and you should be proud of your quest for a better sex life. However, we do understand that sometimes this can be difficult, whether it’s a self-conscious feeling that hampers your ability to orgasm or you live with family members or friends who you simply don’t want stumbling across your private items.
How To Use Lube

What is an Orgasm?

  Definition: Rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region at a speed of around 0.8 per second. Orgasm, sexual climax, cumming, the ‘big O’… call it what you want, the female orgasm is one of life’s simple pleasures. The health benefits of a great orgasm are well known. But hey, even if they were bad for us, they’d still be good, right?   HOW TO ORGASM One of the many great things about being a woman is that there are plenty of ways we can enjoy an orgasm. Masturbation and sex with a partner are the ones you already know about but are there other ways? We talked to a registered sex and relationship therapist who enlightened us about some orgasms you may never have known existed. The most important thing to remember here is that pleasure is the goal. It’s not a race to tick them all off the list, but we can have a lot of fun trying them out. Remember, there are some advanced techniques here – they might not all be for you but that’s fine. Experimentation helps us find what we like and what we don’t. Plus, if you find something you like here, practice makes perfect!   WHAT DOES AN ORGASM FEEL LIKE? Each woman experiences an orgasm differently, and each woman can have many different types of orgasm, so there is no one definitive answer to this question. For most of us, it’s characterised by sexual arousal. A build up of pressure that eventually – and often with the help of a ‘tipping point’ – releases along with muscle contractions in our pelvic region. Some of us find our body shaking, our skin feeling sensitive and, yes, we often wake up the neighbours. After an orgasm we can also enjoy the burst of hormones released by the climax. Oxytocin (known as the ‘love hormone’) and Endorphins (they’re the ones that give you a big ‘high’) can combine to create a euphoric feeling that, if we could bottle it, could probably instigate world peace.   TYPES OF ORGASMS To find out more, we talked to Jodie Slee, a sex and relationship therapist from Sensate Therapy, about the different types of orgasms and how they can be achieved: 1. CLITORAL ORGASM “The surprising thing about the clitoris is that only a small part of it is visible (called the glans). The much larger part is intertwined in the whole vulva region and can be stimulated vaginally and, some say, anally too. So, more orgasms are technically ‘clitoral orgasms’ than you might have thought.” Some women prefer direct clitoral stimulation whereas, for others, touching 8,000 nerve endings at once can be too much. Try out different things and see what works for you. The clitoris is – not surprisingly – very well catered-for when it comes to sex toys and accessories. Clit Stims, Rampant Rabbits, Vibrating Cock Rings and Couples Rings all hit the right spot, so there are plenty of options when finding your favourite. 2. G-SPOT ORGASM “This somewhat mysterious ‘spot’ is a collection of cells found on the front wall of the vagina and is linked with female ejaculation. Many sex toys nowadays are curved towards that spot to make the most of this” Lots of women say that, once you’ve answered that age-old question ‘where is the G-Spot’, using your finger in a ‘come hither’ motion is the way to go. Add in some clitoral stimulation and you can thank us later… G-Spot vibrators come in all shapes and sizes – some aim to apply pressure to the G-Spot, others use thrusting actions to mimic what your fingers can do, and many also have clit stims built in. Love eggs can sit against your G-spot and even be controlled by your partner for a seriously cheeky night out. 3. BLENDED ORGASM “A blended orgasm means the stimulation of more than one erogenous zone for a more powerful orgasm, generally involving the clitoris. Most of us have a ‘tipping point’ that takes us from arousal to orgasm, meaning we introduce another area to the mix – this could be nipple stimulation, anal stimulation… you’re only limited by the number of hands (or toys) at your disposal!” Chances are, if more than one erogenous zone was involved, you’ve had a blended orgasm before. But now you know what they are, what else could you involve? There’s no need to stop at two areas – it really is a case of the more the merrier! The most famous sex toy that hits two spots at once is, of course, the Rampant Rabbit. Offering G-Spot and Clitoral stimulation, there’s a reason that 2 million of them are sold every year. After that, any of our sex toys can help you turn things up – a butt plug, nipple clamps and cooling or tingling lubes can all help you discover new ways to climax. 4. ANAL ORGASM “The anus is flooded with nerve endings and the anal nerve moves through the same nerve that serves the clitoris. Further up into the rectum, stimulation will be picked up by the pelvic nerve, which is the nerve that responds to stimulation of the vagina and cervix.” The key to having an anal orgasm is to start slowly. What you or your partner might have seen in porn does not show the reality. Yes, it can be lots of fun, and is often described as a really intense orgasm – but don’t rush in. Make sure you’re relaxed and use plenty of lube on a small butt plug, a finger or a small dildo. If you’re with a partner, keeping communication open is really important, and if an anal orgasm isn’t quite happening, stimulating the clitoris is likely to help out. 5.A-SPOT ORGASM “The A-Spot is a collection of cells called the Anterior Fornix, located a few inches above the G-Spot, requiring a very large penis (or large dildo) to reach it. The cervix can block the A-spot, which can make it difficult to find – but it is worth it. You need to go deep!” The key here is reaching the spot, so go as deep as you can (without hurting yourself obviously!). If you have a partner with a very large penis, get in a position that allows you to take as much of it in as possible while he’s facing you, such as the Shard, allowing the curve to hit the front wall of your vagina. If you don’t happen to have a partner with a large penis, fear not – we can help! Try a large dildo (don’t forget the lube) and enjoy… 6. NIPPLE ORGASM “Nipples have plenty of nerve endings too, sensations from the nipples travel to the same areas of the brain that sensations from the vagina, clitoris and cervix do, meaning some women can have orgasms from nipple stimulation alone.” Chances are you already know how to caress your own nipples, but there are ways to turn this up and give nipple orgasms a try. Lubes and licks have a lot to offer here, and don’t forget there are tingling lubes, warming lubes, massage lubes – the world is your oyster… Don’t forget nipple clamps and feather ticklers too. The mixture of different sensations could make your toes curl. 7. COREGASM “This type of orgasm is rumoured to come from exercise like Pilates, or activities that involve squeezing the thighs together. I suspect friction from repeated movements in fitted gym wear can also play a part!” A Coregasm, or ‘Exercise-induced Orgasm’ is a bit of a mystery, and a lot of the time seems to be unplanned. Alfred Kinsey wrote about it as early as 1953, but the verdict is still out, scientifically speaking. That said, if you do find your mind drifting towards sexy thoughts while running at the gym or engaging your core during a good Pilates session, there’s no harm in that. Make sure you really enjoy that steamy shower afterwards! 8. FANTASY ORGASM OR 'MINDGASM' “The idea here is that you can climax without any physical stimulation, just using your thoughts to take you all the way. Some lucky women can also orgasm in their sleep.” Sometimes called a ‘Think Off’, this sounds like a lot of fun even if you decide to get your hands or toys involved further down the line. Imagining your favourite fantasies, or memories of the best sex you ever had, tensing your pelvic floor muscles (imagine you’re trying to stop peeing) over and over… doesn’t sound like a bad way to pass some time does it? HOW TO FAKE AN ORGASM In short – don’t! It benefits no-one! Not you (you didn’t cum, did you?), and not your partner. How to make a woman orgasm is more complex than some people realise and there’s nothing wrong with giving some direction on what you want. By being honest, you’re helping your partner to be a better lover and getting better sex yourself into the deal. It’s the 21st century and we can speak up about what we want from sex. If a guy has a problem with that, he’s not the right guy.